The things we dream about ground us by showing us what we have been thinking about. In our waking moments, it may be hard to know what lies in our subconscious minds. In our dreams however, we are reminded of what has been going through our busy minds.
These past couple of weeks were some of the best in my life. I’ve made great relationships with new friends and strengthened the bond I had with old friends. I put myself out there and with Tim Ferriss’ advice, I’ve been trying harder to have the conversations that make me feel most uncomfortable.
In an effort to make me more vulnerable, I will admit to still having feelings of heartbreak. This isn’t a sob story, it is simply a realization that I am willing to admit. It’s hard to believe it’s been a full year since I had broken up my first relationship and I still feel feelings of emptiness. I’ve been telling myself that I was getting better. I think so as well, but I don’t know what feelings will overwhelm me if I were to see her again. I’m reminded of a time not too long ago when I was near the gym and I thought I saw her. My heart was pounding and sweat began to moisten my forehead. She turned around and looked past me. It wasn’t her. Whew.
I’ve come to the realization that girls like her don’t come by often. I can only blame myself for the things that have happened and have hopes that I will find someone like her or better in the future.
Through heartache ignited a fuel in me to become a more interesting excitement-chaser. I’m going to enjoy all of what life has to offer and chase my dreams.
My past will make me better, not bitter.