As I sit here by the fireplace and expensive pool I reflect to last weekend where the idea of death seemed to be so close by. Why do I feel so safe here, now? It’s time to meditate on death and realize that we are not immortal beings who will surely have tomorrow to live for. It isn’t all that melancholy either, it’s actually the opposite. When you ponder about your death you narrow in on those things that you want to complete now rather than later.
For me, I still feel like I don’t know exactly what it is I want. I want so many things, but I haven’t found the one thing that really calls out to me. I like the idea of helping others, but I haven’t devised up a good plan or developed a strong enough skill-set to do so.
For now, I’m trying to develop myself so that I can set myself for success later. The most difficult thing is finding fun in those stages of development. It may be silly of me to think about all the things that will come after this stage before even doing so.
One thing I’ve realized this summer is that I love having people around to chat with. I developed a newfound appreciation for those around me and look forward to creating lasting bonds with those who care for me. Social interactions can be highly satisfying and life-changing at times.
I’ve lost interest in continuing to write more in this post, and I might die later tonight so I won’t waste anymore time continuing this today.
I’ll see you all tomorrow! (hopefully)